Getting pregnant before you are ready can be an extremely scary situation, especially if you are still in high school, don’t have family support, or for any other reason that might make raising a child difficult. Before you make one of the most difficult decisions of your life, please read through these five facts from a very appreciative adoptive mom.
1. You don’t have to go through this experience alone.
Some adoptive parents will never experience the beauty of pregnancy and birth. And if given the chance, would be happy to join you on this journey. Adoptive parents will want to know how their future child is doing and might be willing to participate in appointments with you.
2. The life you carry within you is precious.
While you might feel your child is a burden, to another woman who can’t give birth, your child is heaven sent. Parents who adopt do so because they are ready for a child to join their lives. Because of this, they can offer the stability and comforts you might be struggling with. It might be difficult, but think about your child’s future. Will you be able to financially support a newborn baby? Do you need to finish school? Do you have adequate support from family, the baby’s father, and friends to help you through this experience?
2. The gift you give is invaluable to your child and the adoptive parents.
When a birth mother allows a couple to adopt her child, she is giving a gift of love that cannot be quantified. Adoptive parents will forever be grateful to you for fulfilling their lifelong dreams.
3. With open adoption you don’t lose a child, you gain a family.
Keeping your adoption open has a lot of benefits. The most important being the connection to your child and his or her overall well-being. In addition, you become a part of a new family as well. Although adoption is a permanent decision in which you surrender your parental rights to another family, discuss how an open adoption can be arranged and how much contact you can have. You might be surprised.
4. All of my adopted children’s birth mothers are happy with their decision to have their children adopted.
My husband and I adopted four children through foster care and have three different birth mothers. While they did not have 100% control over their situation, they ultimately decided not to meet requirements for their children to return home. Several years after the adoptions, we reconnected with each birth mom. Each one told us they were glad they made the choice they did regarding their child. They were happy to see how well their kids had turned out and happier still to be reconnected after several years.
Please take time to consider your options thoroughly. Speak to adoption professionals about the process and utilize the services provided. It’s not an easy choice, but it may a choice for you to consider for you and your child.
Written by Gelana McCloud